Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don't want to need at all.


Damn it! Why do I feel this way? I thought, hitting the wall. Earlier that morning I had told Ulrich that we should just be friends, and since then I’d felt like someone had a knife in my chest and would cruelly twist it every time I saw him.

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.


FUCK! I screamed in my head. I couldn’t stand the pain, it felt like that I’d cut myself from an anchor that held me in reality, WHY? He’s just another boy; there will be plenty of others that I can be with, so why do I feel like SHIT?

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight
It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.


Thousands of images flew through my head, him saving me from Xana, being one of my first friends, sparing with me… the comforting warmth that radiated from him. Damn it! I pressed my palms into my ears, as if it could block the rush of memory.


When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.


Tears welled into my eyes, an unpredicted flood that overpowered every obstacle that I put in its way. “Why?” I asked “Why is it that I feel like this over a boy?”
But then again, he’s so much more to me than just any other boy.