Reviews For Darkness
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Reviewer: QuinSeparable Signed starstar [Report This]
Date: Jul 24, 2007 01:17 PM Title: Darkness

Not too bad but I think it could be longer. And please, don't take this as a flame but...

Just a suggestion. Watch and make sure you don't jump tenses and be careful about fragments. I would also caution you to not start so many sentances with "and" as well as perhaps brush up on the rules for using commas. 

Reviewer: GarageKid Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: Jul 10, 2007 06:47 PM Title: Darkness

Wow, that was an interesting one-shot. It would be better if you added a sequal.

10/10 great job for your first fic!

Author's Response: aah thanks, i would love to do another sequel...when i get the idea! =]

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