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Not sure if dates are possible

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Not sure if dates are possible

Postby Sithking Zero » Mon Aug 14, 2006 2:26 am

Okay. I know that this is my first time posting here... but...

I was thinking. And I don't see how I could ever have a meaningful, lasting relationship with anyone. I have the attention span of a goldfish, and once I get bored with something, I abandon it. My morals dictate that I never hurt anyone (I'm a pacifist outside of video games), and I couldn't bear to cause suffering to anyone, be it in their hearts or physically. Not only that, but I don't like people. I like to be alone except for the online forums.

The worst part is, I want to date people! I would like to find someone I could have long, meaningful discussions with, or walk on the beach with, and all that stuff that dating people do! But in my mind, I know that that could never happen. Also, I hate children. Baring the fact that I am one, I dislike little kids, so basically, my family line ends with me.

I hate being smart enough to figure this stuff out on my own...

To recap: I have short attention span. I know that I'll get bored dating fast and break people's hearts. I don't want to do that. I do want to date.

Can someone help me?
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Postby Tekirai » Mon Aug 14, 2006 5:33 am

Hoo boy, I'm in the same boat as you. Being in a school filled with guys who absolutely hate me 'n all, just because I'm really smart. >_> Yet, there's some I want to be really good friends with. Or if I'm willing to go that far, closer than that. xP Hoho, but I'm not expecting that to come just yet.

All I can think of for you to do is...as incredibly crap as it sounds, wait. You haven't specified if there's anyone you actually like already, and well... you can't paint a fence without the paint. (there goes Tekirai's bad homemade proverbs again) It would help a lot to figure out if you have someone that you like already rather than go around saying 'HI I'M BOB DATE MEEEE PLZ :DD *shot*', because that just messes things up AND makes you look like a freak.

And you must remember- self doubt is the enemy. Once the time comes, you won't be worrying about all that.

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Postby The BB of C » Mon Aug 14, 2006 3:10 pm

The fact that you want to date is all the proof I need to know that you can date. It's just burried deep inside you and you've got to uncover it. This mostly happens to dorky little people with no self confidence which is (no offense intended) what I'm kind of sensing here. The moment you figure out how to get passed all of this and uncover your will to be around people, and talk, and socialize, then you'll be able to do anything you want.
I used to be a lot like that. What I did is I found a very peaceful medium. Today, I am a rather social person. I hang out with a lot of people, mostly at school. But I do like my alone time and whenever I'm not with friends, I'm hanging out by myself. It really does feel like a good balance to me. I'm not dating yet just because I can't right now without my family getting involved and my family would just take all the fun out of it. But what I did is I figured out about myself that I truely wanted to be friends with people and I did want to go out on dates and hang out with my friends all of the time and it wasn't too long after that before I found the courage to approach different groups at school.
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Postby YDV » Mon Aug 14, 2006 3:39 pm

Awww D: *hugs Sithking(Lani gives you a hug too xD)*

That's sucky. And I used to be a lot like that too... Although I still have the attention span of a goldfish, abandon things when I get bored, and all that jazz xD;; But don't worry those never really mean much cuz people who you'd have a good relationship with wouldn't care.

I think everyone wants to date... so I'm sure you're not alone. Not to sound cheesy, but I'm also sure there is someone out there for you. I usually don't like small children that aren't related to me either xD;; But I -do- plan on adopting (So basically my family line ends with me anyway.. xD)

TIS HOKAY! I dunno. Um.... I suck at giving advice. xD;;
BEHHHH
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Postby Rail Runner » Mon Aug 14, 2006 5:00 pm

just try talking to people a bit more, and learn to open up a bit...take it a small step at a time...I used to be sorta shy myself..but I got past that, and now I can pretty much talk to anyone..and everyone...it will become much easier after you get used to the idea of doing it.
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Postby Sithking Zero » Mon Aug 14, 2006 6:41 pm

The BB of C wrote:The fact that you want to date is all the proof I need to know that you can date. It's just burried deep inside you and you've got to uncover it. This mostly happens to dorky little people with no self confidence which is (no offense intended) what I'm kind of sensing here.


Thanks. I feel so much better.

THough thanks, guys.
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Postby The BB of C » Mon Aug 14, 2006 6:43 pm

You're welcome. Do you have any more questions along these lines before I drop this topic in my mind?
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Postby Sithking Zero » Mon Aug 14, 2006 6:45 pm

Well, my problem isn't so much that I'm shy (okay, a little bit), it's more from the fact that I don't want to hurt someone's feelings by getting close to them and then getting bored.
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Postby The BB of C » Mon Aug 14, 2006 6:57 pm

I'll bet if anyone's feelings get hurt it won't last more than a week.
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Postby Rail Runner » Mon Aug 14, 2006 7:45 pm

they will get over it...in all honesty...:)
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Postby The BB of C » Mon Aug 14, 2006 7:53 pm

In truth you shouldn't worry about hurting their feelings anyway. If you feel you need to break up with someone, it's probably for a good reason. Be nice and careful about what you say and what they feel while dating. But also stay firm and confident. To keep a relationship fresh, if it gets boring, try doing different things on your dates. Be sure to find a person you really like or it will get really boring really quickly.
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Postby Rail Runner » Mon Aug 14, 2006 7:54 pm

try to find someone who has at least 2 or 3 things in common with you...that way you will agree more on things, and argue less...and that can keep a relationship from ending too quickly.
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Postby Lola » Tue Aug 15, 2006 11:50 am

Everyone can date if they try hard enough.
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